Praise What’s Right
Even when we think we are behaving in a fashion after God, we still may not be. Praise is a word that we’ve parsed and weighted heavily over many hundreds or thousands of generations toward our own purposes. The word has two meanings, 1) an expression of approval and 2) an exaltation of a deity or ruler. If you’ve ever read the Psalms of the bible, you’ve read the second application of these two meanings in the phrases “praise God, praise the Lord,” hundreds of times. In fact in the bible, it’s difficult to find any positive reference to praise except where it was directed toward God. In John 5:41, Jesus even says “I do not accept praise from men” and a few versus later, in John 5:44 He says, “How can you believe if you accept praise from one another, yet make no effort to obtain the praise that comes from the only God“?
Modern psychologists have written extensively on the virtues of laying unrestricted praise on our young children for nearly any activity or effort that results in any outcome short of disaster. I presume that most parents or guardians have personally modified this activity, but the practice itself has become second nature. The problem is that children learn several different things: My effort is rewarded, My performance was worthy, and of course the desired lesson, I am worthy. Now if these accolades are cautiously interspersed with corrections (where warranted), shared credit (often appropriate), and a realistic assessment of effort (relative to each’s capabilities), the result may not be: I am good, always work hard and deserve just rewards, why, because my parents said so! Let’s face it parents, most of us struggle with objective assessments of our children.
The purpose of this article is not to admonish parents, we’ve all made mistakes in that role and it’s certainly not to guarantee low self esteem in our children. The point is that we’ve learned too well to seek and deliver personal praise. In life, in school, in the workplace, it’s all the same. We’ve left God out of the equation, and without God, the equation does not compute! If we’ve used our gifts, acknowledge the gifts and the giver. If we’ve beaten the odds, acknowledge the giver of perseverance. If we’ve prevailed where others have failed, give praise to God and to each one of us who follows that lead. God is the critical variable in every life equation.
JC Calkins with COMMON SENSE 4 UNCOMMON PEOPLE (please leave us a comment in the area below)
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